The Cypher Dom: Christian Grey and the Failure of Visual Media
I guess you have to thank a bad book and a mediocre film if it engenders thought on the subject of the textual and visual portrayal of eroticism. The success of Fifty Shades of Grey has certainly brought a debate about BDSM, stalkerish males, passive women and the compromise of bad sex for love into […]
I Am Charlie, Uncomfortably: The Price of Free Discourse
“To hold a pen is to be at war.” Voltaire In the wake of the murder of 12 people at the Charlie Hebdo Magazine offices, there has been shock, mourning and much passionate debate. It is sad that it takes the assassination of a group of French satirical cartoonists to prompt a serious discussion of […]
Ask Better Questions
Kristina Lloyd, whose novel Undone has just been published (and is phenomenally well-written – buy it), has been doing the blog tour thing. Today, Anna Sky hosted an interesting post by Kristina: “Do Women Prefer Erotica?” Whether you’re a reader or a writer of erotica, it’s worth your while to read it. At the end, […]
Labels, Tribes and the Beauty of Singularities.
I cannot write you. I try and fail. I try, I fail and I’m a butcher. Me I’ve had some ongoing conversations, and I’ve offended some people recently, because I’ve refused the label ‘bisexual’. I want to take the opportunity to explain why and to acknowledge that for some people these words matter greatly, and […]
Jouissance, Hard Limits & an Ass-covering culture.
My story of yesterday generated a strange clutch of emails. I’ve written before about my ambivalent feelings on the subject of ‘safe’ BDSM, not simply because, on a very personal basis, desire and safety are almost mutually exclusive for me, but because I worry we live in a culture that constantly demands absolutes, assures us […]
Trailing Wisps of Glory: Goodbye Ms. Angelou
“I believe each of us comes from the Creator trailing wisps of glory.” I was very sad to read of Maya Angelou’s passing. I’m not a poet or African American or any kind of woman in the way I think she was, and yet she spoke to me. There are so few people in the […]
On Writing, Authorship and Sacred Words
Lisabet Sarai, a writer for whom I have deep admiration, just finished blogging at the ERWA Blog on her experience of revising her novel to suit a publisher’s imprint. ‘Negotiation‘ is a great post worth reading. Most especially if you want to see the process of writing oneself an absolution. I don’t say that cattily […]
On Love
There is a kind of love that drags itself, gut-shot and with two broken legs towards death. It has no pride, or shame, or sense of self. It refuses all other loyalties, all other promises and obligations. There is nothing pretty about this kind of love. It turns those of us who have felt it […]
Fuck Decaf, or The Two Tribes of Perversion
There are two tribes of perverts. Those who believe and those who don’t; real perverts and fake perverts. I contend today that the world is dominated by the fake ones. I’m not a wholehearted fan of the Yugoslavian philosopher, Slavoj Zizek, but he has proposed an interesting theory I embrace. He says that the world […]
When Men Write Erotic Fiction
When men write erotic fiction (as opposed to porn, where the piece is devoid of conflict and usually sequence of physical events interspersed with banal and cliché phrases that are the memes that stand-in, ineloquently. for someone getting pleasure) they often try to protect themselves. Even work by seasoned writers who should know better, I […]