1. I think there is a WORLD of difference between what people fantasize about and what they actually do.
  2. If you have a difficult time understanding this difference, you should not be reading my work.
  3. I don’t hold an opinion what proclivities may or may not be considered ‘mental disorders’. I do know that homosexuality was, until very recently, assumed to be and classified as a mental disorder and, because of this, I question the reliability of these designations.
  4. I do NOT condone the making, posting, downloading or viewing of child pornography. I condemn it – both morally and legally.
  5. I do not condone rape. I condemn it. The stories that I have written that include rape – sometimes eroticised, sometimes not – are fiction and fantasy. It does NOT follow that I am ambivalent about forced sex or rape in reality. I condemn it (again.)
  6. I assume, if you have clicked past the warning page, that you have reached the age of majority in whatever place you live, and that you are sane enough to take responsibility for your actions.
  7. My stories are not intended as how-to manuals, life-style guides or psychology textbooks. I am not a psychologist, sex therapist or anything else that would qualify me to suggest how you should live your life.
  8. If you read something in my work that you find offensive, please be responsible enough to stop reading. The appeal of my work is not universal nor is it intended to be.
  9. As a woman, I have inherited the burden of thousands of years of social, religious and sexual oppression. My understanding of self, my agency, my language and my sexuality were born, molded and twisted by that oppression. I am happy to have a discussion on why I write what I write, but I will not tolerate being told what I can or cannot write about.
  10. I am not perfect and I do not exercise perfect judgment. If you assume I am, or that I do, please leave.

  68 comments for “Manifesto

  1. January 28, 2011 at 8:53 am

    Sanity? Sexual oppresion? Psychology? Fantasy?

    DiedandGoneToHeaven! 😉

    Nice site, RG!


  2. March 22, 2011 at 7:35 am

    Love, love love!

  3. Leonard
    January 16, 2012 at 5:18 am

    I like this. It’s up to the reader to be responsible. If they don’t like what they’re reading or it bothers them, they should stop. Why blame you? Enjoying the site and stories.

  4. February 28, 2012 at 1:08 pm

    VERY astute, appropriate, and witty. Thank you for this.

  5. July 11, 2012 at 3:59 am

    I do not believe all your disclaimers.

  6. July 11, 2012 at 6:51 am

    Then I politely direct you back to point 8.

    • Peer Fram
      January 7, 2018 at 9:33 pm

      Maybe ImageMundi was referring to the first bit of point 10. I was thinking along the same lines. But then I remembered your appalling habit of telling fantastic stories with typos! Off to the stocks with you.

      BTW: I agree with what you write about fantasies. For me anyway, they seem to be largely not of my choosing, very much fun, mostly free of cost and non-fattening. How many other nice things are there like that? Just providing we know the difference between them and real other people.

      I love your stories.

  7. Ellyb
    December 1, 2012 at 12:08 am

    I believe I am going to use the 10 Points as my affirmations for the next 10 days.
    Just discovered your website… may I say, what a Beautifully honest Introduction.


  8. February 19, 2013 at 1:28 am

    Sound beliefs, well-stated. A kindred sister. I look forward to reading more on your blog.

  9. Janette
    September 8, 2013 at 11:07 am

    RG, hello 🙂
    I discovered your works today and have spent the better part of a lovely Saturday reading your stories. They take me directly to where the characters are interacting. They are stark, dark…and so realistic. While I don’t ever want to find myself in any such situation, I am nevertheless drawn in – heart racing, pussy clenching, sometimes breathless with experiencing the danger and eroticism.

    I hope to keep enjoying the product of your exceptional talent. Beautifully written, captivating stories…thank you.
    Warm regards,

    • September 8, 2013 at 11:54 am

      I’m so glad you found me and you enjoy the work. It’s lovely to hear that you did.

  10. September 23, 2013 at 6:59 am

    Wow, just found your website. You are a remarkable writer. If I had 10% of your talent, I would be a pretty darn good writer but alas, I tend to fall on the math/science spectrum. Just wanted to say that I am an avid reader of erotica (and lots of other kinds of literature too) but 95% of it is drivel and not worth reading. You are a breath of fresh air. Probably the best female writer in this genre. As for male writers — as whole not much to write home about! I will mention a guy with an online blog (well he stopped last year but it is still online) — discerningdom. If you know his writing, you will know what I mean. If you have not heard of him, he write essays about D/s. I highly recommend him to you:

    Oh, I should also compliment you on your editing. Practically flawless. Real professional. Do you have help? If ever, you want another reader, count me as a volunteer.

    I did find one little flaw — part 7 of the Veiled Girl with a Lute [your titles are pretty good too] last sentence

    “Now, if let you go and reach for the soap, do I have to worry about you kicking me in the balls?”

    should read, “Now, if I let you go …

    Keep up the great work,

    • November 25, 2013 at 2:48 pm

      Argh.. typos are the bane of my existence and I make so many! Thanks for catching it for me.

      • Jules Godson
        February 15, 2015 at 3:18 am

        Er, what *is* the correct way to call out typos? Personally I hate having them around, but it’s hard to mention one to someone else in a comment without sounding like a mindless scold. (Yes, I confess I noticed a few. E.g., in the very nice “Better Left Unsaid” discrete should be discreet … and “worms it’s way” should be “its” … should i have left that unsaid?)

        P.S. Please read and delete this comment. I don’t want to look like a scold!

        • February 15, 2015 at 8:03 am

          Hello Jules… This is exactly the right way to call out typos. You don’t look like a scold at all, you look like a careful reader who is doing me a great favour by catching them. And I’d like to keep this comment up just so that people know I love it when people catch typos and misspellings. There’s nothing rude or scoldish. It is a mark of respect.

  11. Jude Schweppe
    September 24, 2013 at 8:17 pm

    Hi RG
    Is there a way of contacting you directly to talk about writing for our new venture?

    Look forward to hearing from you.


  12. September 27, 2013 at 4:08 am

    Ms. R. Girl

    Dear Ms. Girl,

    I just listened to your pod-cast (dated 2010-02-01), “The Rebuttal: Writing Taboo in Erotica and the State of the Genre”.
    You invited comment. Unfortunately, I don’t understand ITunes well enough to know how to comment on a
    podcast. I hope you won’t mind my choosing this means to give you my comments.

    My reaction to what you say is: Excellent, excellent, excellent. I think I agree with everything you said, and
    I particularly appreciate that listening gave me a few new insights. This pod-cast makes me desire to read
    a whole lot of your blog entries on this web-site possibly more than I desire to listen to your erotic fiction
    pod-casts—and let me make clear that I enjoy your erotic stories quite a bit, both in the fundamental way
    that anyone enjoys erotica, and as good writing.

    I wish for all kinds of good fortune for you and yours.

    Cordially, and with deep, deep respect,

    Richard Ware

    • September 27, 2013 at 5:05 pm

      Hello Richard,

      Thank you so much for your very kind compliments. I admit that I have no idea how comments on iTunes work either. It’s not a terribly user friendly system. I’m very glad you like the stories. There are, by the nature of this blog, of inconsistent quality, but I do try my best.
      I appreciate you taking the time to hunt down the blog and comment here.

      And RG will do nicely. Heh.

  13. slave442
    November 25, 2013 at 1:17 pm

    Hello RG.

    I wanted to leave you a comment after discovering your webpage and exploring over it.
    Thanks for taking the time and effort to put this thing together, just to share what’s inside of you.

    I’m a guy who lived 33 years normal, then snapped his spine at work. Now I’m paralyzed and cannot feel from the chest down.
    I can still get an erection without drugs pretty easily, but it requires physical stimulation; the neurological response is gone.
    (I haven’t experienced an orgasm of my own in 4 years now, either.)

    Well, my wife at the time didn’t much care for that, so after 2 years of no sex life we separated.

    I’ve learned much since then about finding a way to fill that hollow.
    And because of that, I truly appreciate what you’ve built here.

    Art saves lives.

    • November 25, 2013 at 2:43 pm

      Well, first I want to thank you for taking the time to comment here, because this is one of the best compliments I’ve ever had. Being pretty completely into stimulation of the mind, myself, although entirely voluntarily, I can see how some of the stories might have resonated. And, if I may take the opportunity to objectify you just a little… there’s nothing quite as sexy as a man with a boner in the brain. The one between his legs is easily substituted for plastic. The one in his mind… there’s no substitute for that.

  14. headway10
    November 25, 2013 at 2:57 pm

    Love number 9.

    And, you know, I am a fan. I would never, ever, stop reading you! Ever….

    You are awesome, RG

  15. TerryLee
    January 8, 2014 at 11:05 am

    A rapidly escalating state of inebriation will soon prevent much coherency, but I’m currently perceiving Dark Gracie kicking your ass with her cover art…. Please compete…

    X Terry

    • January 8, 2014 at 1:28 pm

      Yup, I didn’t understand that at all. But Dark Gracie kicks my ass in all sorts of ways. Well, we can’t all be Gracie.

  16. Starr
    January 10, 2014 at 1:31 am

    I wrote something much longer but decided it was not appropriate here. So please let me simply say how much I treasure your well-written and insightful erotic literature and your ability to differentiate between your identity and that of your readers. Cheers for your manifesto! Please keep publishing!

  17. Spencer
    September 7, 2014 at 5:03 am

    Like others I find great difficulty is keeping this brief, the quality of the writing is so good it is as though a panel of Whartons Hemmingways, Conrads Sands Fitzgeralds et al were involved, totally captivating full of insight and beautifully crafted, I became totally lost in the DP this evening, so very glade to see it is TBC. I have The Waiting Room on my kindle which I will gorge on later, but would love to have some of your works in hardback I will not be alone on that clearly. Your manifesto is full of humanity and so right, also the humility is quite remarkable and refreshing, thank you. I wish every success.

    • September 7, 2014 at 5:19 am

      I think you mean ‘humidity’ rather than humility. 🙂

      • Spencer
        September 7, 2014 at 3:55 pm

        plenty of that in all its forms 🙂

  18. shyam
    December 28, 2014 at 4:46 pm

    Hello remittance girl. I love your art of writing and your thinking process a lot. I came to this site by guidance of a lady by name clairie. She is a big fan of ur site and stories. I met her in a online chat room and she had very good way with words. Later I came to know its coz of ur site and stories. then I lost contact with her. I am sooo desperately searching for her from then on. She had come to that chat room with the name “sassenach”. I am thinking of her daily. I am addicted to her. can u somehow help me to get in touch with her pleaseeeeee. I beg u please. its a humble request to u dear remmitance girl

    • December 28, 2014 at 10:07 pm

      I am very sorry to say I don’t know anyone by either of those names. I’ve looked through my comments and that name doesn’t come up at all. I wish you luck finding her.

  19. Claire
    December 29, 2014 at 3:06 am

    Your writing is beautiful, evocative, provocative, and I am so grateful to you for all the time and care you put into your craft, your art. I hungered for a long while until I came across your website. Besides Anais Nin and a few Asian writers from long ago, I find your work to be so much more refined, convincing and powerful than the sort of published writing I have come across in this genre. You have the ability to transport a reader beyond themselves…a measure that for me determines true works of Art from the mundane.
    Thank you!

  20. Seldom
    September 12, 2015 at 6:04 am

    Hi RG
    Just came across this Ted Talk by Danielle Sheypuk.

    With respect to the last bit of point 9 and because point 10 would probably be number 1 in my manifesto I wonder if I might invite you to consider writing a story that includes someone with a significant physical impairment. Or share your thoughts on Dr Sheypuk’s contention that we miss out by not including people with disabilities as sexual beings.

    I do not have a disability myself but work in the disability sector and support inclusion.

    • September 12, 2015 at 2:47 pm

      Hello Seldom,
      I watched the vid and I tweeted it. Beyond discussing the ‘neuterization’ of people with disabilities, I think she manages to reveal the reality behind a lot of myths of the non-disabled. Many more people than will admit it are not having good sex – probably because we don’t let ourselves have genuine sex. We are so brainwashed into adopting ridiculous ideals that we often shoot ourselves in the foot even when, most especially when, we’re standing.

      It has never occurred to me that people with disabilities are not sexual human beings. If you’re breathing, you’re sexual in some way. The problem is that the ways in which, as a culture, have deemed it appropriate and permissible to think, feel, be sexual are intensely narrow and, as consumerism continues to underscore the imperative to posses the perfect sexual body, it narrows further. The irony is that far from evolving to a place where we include more and more people into sexual space, there are more and more people being excluded from it – able-bodied or otherwise.

      I embarked a while ago on writing a story involving an amputee with PTSD but I realised that I simply did not know enough about it to write it properly. I had a short relationship with a man trans-femoral amputation, but although it was long enough to know the sex was great, it was not really long enough to get a sense of how HE felt in his body. And that’s the kind of knowledge you need to write about disabled sex well without fetishizing or objectifying. It’s not a matter of the mechanics; its a matter of interior perception. To be honest, having never found physical disability a reason to discount someone sexually, it was the mental challenges of social perceptions and the effects of PTSD on the mind that intrigued me more to write about. If you’ve read much of my work, you’ll notice that I tend to be interested in emotional disability and how that plays out, erotically.

      I’m a person who can only write about people with physical disabilities from the outside, as an onlooker. That’s not really good enough.

      However, on the positive side, there are a lot of writers with physical disabilities out there. And I encourage them to write more erotica. I know you may think this sounds like a terrible cop-out, but not only is ‘write what you know’ a good maxim, but a non-disabled person does run the risk of being accused of appropriating the voices of people with physical disabilities, if she or he goes down that route.

  21. Cloudy
    December 29, 2015 at 4:20 am

    Thank you for creating this site. Quality erotic fiction for a mostly female readership that doesn’t resemble 50 Shades? I may have a bit of an intellectual, soulful crush on you, even moreso from reading your classy replies to the previous comments.

    The last intelligent erotic fiction site I read was Sensual Venus but it appears to be defunct now.

    Sexy, brave and bold. I look forward to reading more.

    Thank you x

  22. Morgan
    February 23, 2016 at 10:54 am

    I appreciate you

    • February 26, 2016 at 5:33 pm

      Thank you. I appreciate you – if you weren’t reading, my writing would mean nothing. 😀

  23. Jamila Taylor
    February 29, 2016 at 8:18 am

    I have been frequently returning to this website for a few years and I really enjoy your work. They are enthralling reads and you paint wonderful pictures using words and express the characters emotions clearly. I am very grateful for them,

  24. March 6, 2016 at 1:52 am

    I’m so enjoying your blog today. Thank you for making so much of your literature available. I’ll be back as often as possible to read and learn from a master.

  25. Flemingo
    March 31, 2016 at 3:18 am

    I’ve very much enjoyed the stories I’ve read… I hope you continue to write and if you were to publish them I’d happily pay for a copy. Thank you for sharing a bit of the darkness that resides in me.

  26. Michael
    April 13, 2016 at 12:09 am

    I love your work. As, someone raised on religion and mainstream porn, it is so healing to find unapologetic, healthy fantasy. Thank you. Just a heads up. I think you meant age of maturity, not age of majority under point 6 above.

    • April 15, 2016 at 10:49 am

      Heheh. Majority is the legal term where I come from.

  27. BalloonBoyUK
    August 28, 2016 at 10:48 pm

    Hi Remittance Girl,

    I am wondering if you do (or would be wiling to do) audio work, please? That is, read-out and record (in MP3 format) a small/short erotic story for me. (Failing that, do you know of anyone or anywhere that offers such a service, please?)

    I wasn’t sure how to contact you, but I admire your work a lot, and I like the fact you are fearless and open-minded in what you write about.

    If you would kindly get back in touch with me, I’d be immensely appreciative.

  28. Laura
    September 26, 2016 at 4:17 am

    Dear Ms RG,

    I would like to thank you for the access you have given to your work, and compliment you on your writing. I am am avid reader of pretty much anything, and have been since early childhood. For what it’s worth, I am impressed both by the depth of your characters and your ability to write a wide variety, and impressive volume, of work without seeming the least bit repetitive!

    Kind regards,


  29. Ian
    December 30, 2016 at 7:41 pm

    Beautifully and cogently put, and full of wisdom. As a writer myself, I think this ought to be the manifesto of all writers everywhere.

    • December 31, 2016 at 9:21 am

      Thank you. Lately, I must admit to having reservations about some of my statements. I must think on it further.

  30. Experience Junky
    January 10, 2017 at 10:37 pm

    Hi RG,

    I just discovered your site a few days ago, and I have been loving the podcast! You are a marvelous writer, and you paint incredible pictures. It is only with the greatest restraint that I have been able to stop myself from binging on multiple episodes at a time.

    I just listened to “The Virtue of Patience” and it occurred to me that I am on the same journey. You are teasing and tantalizing me mercilessly, but have made it clear that you are in control of our path. I am tempted to speak up, but you have told me to just enjoy the ride.

    So I am content to see what your deliciously wicked mind comes up with next. But I am at one great disadvantage compared to the man in the elevator: I so wish I could get the slightest whiff of your excitement on my fingers.

  31. Albie
    January 14, 2017 at 2:45 pm

    Your body of work is mindblowing! Your stories are rich and deep, exploring so many emotions and multiple viewpoints around sex and sexuality. Finally some well-told tales about love and attraction between women. I have read all your stories on this website along with Coming Together and Beautiful Losers on Kindle. Will you be publishing any more books or stories this year? Perhaps you are taking a well-earned break! Either way, I hope to read more from you 🙂

  32. February 25, 2017 at 7:43 am

    I think the world would be a very different place if humans could disregard color, gender, sexual preference, outside appearance, and religious choices. I appreciate your manifesto.

    • Lorenzo
      September 7, 2017 at 8:51 am

      Dear Mischa,

      Although I do agree with your comment, I would suggest two things: one, that perhaps instead of disregarding, a better choice, an enriching choice some times, could be assuming, other times it could even be embracing, or even cherishing. It would be presumptuous of me to put forward examples, since I am sure you can find many.

      The other suggestion has to do with religion, and I hope to offend no one: perhaps stemming from the fact that many religions see their beliefs as the only truth, they often generate exclusion, bigotry, and in general nasty ways of looking at infidels, pagans or heretics… and this is precisely what your comment is against.

      If history teaches us anything about religion, it is that quite often it has behaved and, I am sorry to say, it still does, as the opium of the people of marxist theory. To wit… Again, I shall leave you to fill the dotted line. I will not disregard religious choices in fellow humans unless these do the same with me and do not condemn me as an infidel or heathen or sinner or whatever the term in vogue may be; rather, I shall look carfully into the beliefs of the people I meet, just in case.

      Best regards from a fellow human.



  33. Kayla
    September 5, 2017 at 9:50 pm

    I’ve stumbled across your page in my work and am entirely glad I did for work and for personal reasons. I’ve read a handful of your stories (and plan to continue), have read your comments to people who write to you, your manifesto, and I think, if you’re interested of course, you are a perfect fit for what the show I’m working on is after. I’m a producer on a dating game show on which the upcoming bachelor is very passionate about fantasy and erotica and is looking for someone compatible with him in the idea that there is absolutely “a WORLD of difference between what people fantasize about and what they actually do.” as you wrote, and that it is incorrect to say that “a wholesome life and indulging the erotic imagination is incompatible.” as you commented to a reader. I also love that you ask people to donate to the ACLU ! You seem like a great, open-minded, conscientious human being, and if you are in or near NYC single and interested in men (ours is in his 30s), I’d love to have you on the dating game show – and would be absolutely willing to maintain your privacy, if you appear on the show we need not mention this work or this site, or anything other you’d like kept confidential – and I so so apologize for commenting here like this, I just had to risk it as I couldn’t find any contact info for you otherwise – as this is your site I will definitely understand your wanting to delete this comment – but would love it if you’d email me back if interested in any of what I’ve written! Thanks so much for taking the time, and either way keep up the incredible work, it’s helping people get in touch with their deeper truer selves.

  34. Lorenzo
    September 7, 2017 at 8:31 am

    Oh! How refreshing! RG, I fear I shall become a fan! I will not ellaborate on the quality of your page and its design, on your manifesto, that resonates a lot within, on my very brief -so far- perusal of some of your texts… BUT I do have to say that, finding one of your titles to be ‘Beautiful Losers’, I am touched. Deeply. Am I assuming too much in thinking you chose the title perhaps in remembrance of, perhaps in homage to, L. Cohen? If so, please accept my excuses, but I am a fan of his… and perhaps you would be too?

    I first read about Kateri Tekakwitha so many years ago that, bashfully, I would rather not tell, but my sexuality was then starting to blossom…

    On another note, although Spanish born and bred I am an avid catcher of typos, and given your approach to these, I will gladly -and respectfully, of course- get back to you if and when.

    I have this feeling that I will enjoy reading you so very much…!

    All the best


  35. October 11, 2017 at 2:54 am

    Hi Remi, I used one of your poems in this video. I loved it.

  36. Tye
    October 25, 2017 at 9:21 am

    H, You are a very good writer but why all the religious references?

    • Tye
      October 25, 2017 at 9:27 am

      I would like to understand that a bit better. What is he point you ar making and why? Are you Jewish?

      • October 26, 2017 at 8:19 am

        I am, ethnically and culturally Jewish. Sephardic. But I really don’t understand the rest of your comment. Typo?

    • October 26, 2017 at 8:17 am

      I guess religion has informed my outlook on life, even though I am not a believer.

  37. Rane
    November 8, 2017 at 4:18 am

    RM, your writing is smart, sexy and refreshing. I love what you have written above as well. I so appreciate how you have crafted your words to create instant arousal, and and arousal with depth. It has inspired me to write more and for the first time to explore this genre. Thank you – I feel like I have had an intellectual orgasm.

  38. Lif
    January 10, 2018 at 2:44 pm

    I stumbled across your work recently and have been loving it! I’m glad I read your manifesto, it’s so very reasonable and responsible. Honestly, I try to avoid learning about authors (for any genre), because I feel biased when I read. No regrets this time though! Looking forward to your work.

  39. James
    January 25, 2018 at 10:22 am

    RE: Kiss of Fire

    I’ve only recently come across your work, and I have to say that you write beautifully. Your stories are filled with so much raw emotion, yet the subtleties are what set you apart from other authors. Thank you very much.

    I also would like to add that this story had a powerful meaning to me personally; even without the sex, the message rang clear. Their sexual interaction, and most especially their intimate interaction at the end, really hit home.

    Many thanks, please keep writing.

  40. Henry
    February 6, 2018 at 12:46 am

    RG I enjoy your stories so much I feel bad pointing out typos but since you encourage it … in Three Times Lucky “tried to tug me back down her her tits” should be “tried to tug me back down to her tits”.

    The sense of flow is so strong that I feel a typo as almost a physical collision.

    PS the comment input thingy on this story returned an ERR_Connection_Refused so I put tis here instead

  41. March 3, 2018 at 12:38 am

    I love your site! I’m currently breaking into the world of erotica writing and was wondering how to become a guest writer on your site? Thank you for your work, your passion, and your dedication to this beautiful craft.

    • March 20, 2018 at 3:28 am

      I’m sorry Kim, I do do guest writers on this blog. But lots of people do.

  42. D
    January 29, 2019 at 10:00 pm

    I am struggling against a low libido period and trying to find my own erotic imagination, your writing is amazing and is helping me in many ways! deep and meaning-full.
    Thank you

  43. Logos
    March 16, 2019 at 5:14 pm


    I was so sad to hear that you no longer write erotic fiction. Your writing has had such a positive impact on my confidence, my world-view, as well as my relationships. I am of course certain that your reason for leaving erotic fiction is a good one; still, you will be missed.


  44. Alicia
    June 6, 2019 at 1:15 am

    Wait, what? You are no longer writing erotic fiction? BUT I JUST FOUND YOU GODDAMMIT!

    Seriously, you cannot stop woman. People will cry and and our mounds will dry and we will be forced to go and find something similar and you know WE WILL NEVER FIND IT.

    I have only ever felt like I have discovered magic, once in my life. And that was when I found a copy of Neil Gaiman’s Smoke and Mirrors.

    The second time? Discovering your site.
    I am a huge fan of his work, and now, a huge one of yours.

    You are like the female, sexy and twisted, magical erotic version of Neil Gaimans to me.

    Thank you

  45. Other
    June 23, 2019 at 1:07 am

    In addition to enjoying your writing style, which is so fresh yet raw at the same time, I cannot express how appreciative I am of your goal as an erotic fiction writer. I am very impressed by the fact that you have chosen to share your work in this manner in order to stimulate the conversation surrounding pleasure. Shattering the sort of “hush hush” nature that we, as humans, have ascribed to sexual pleasure has helped me develop in my understanding of what it means to embrace and love myself and others. So thank you! I’ll definitely be sharing your work with my friends.

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